5/5 Stars 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟
This week, as we celebrate the invention of the turkey, we find ourselves with a real Thanksgiving miracle on our hands – the 5-star Lean Cuisine.
The Lean Cuisine Comfort Glazed Turkey Tenderloins feels like Thanksgiving in a tiny, frozen box. There’s turkey, gravy, sweet potatoes and savory stuffing. If you really want to make it authentic, you can call your dad while you eat it, so he can remind you to start a 401k immediately. (And I can remind him that my retirement plan – winning the Powerball and buying a bunch of mansions stacked on top of each other – will work out just fine.)
Taste: 5/5
Look, maybe the holiday is making me sentimental. Maybe I’m just grateful to eat a Lean Cuisine that doesn’t contain inexplicable spaghetti. But this is actually very good.
Ease of Cooking: ⅘
It takes 5 and a half minutes to cook, which is almost as long as a full-on massive turkey, but you don’t have to stir, so that’s a plus.
Appearance: ⅖
Look, does it resemble the photo at all, whatsoever? No. Absolutely not. But like a true Thanksgiving miracle, it’s what’s on the inside that counts. (And what’s on the inside is 3 million grams of sodium that’s now pumping through my body.)
Overall: 5/5.
Someone get the Butterball hotline on the phone and tell them their turkeys can go to hell, we’re all eating Lean Cuisine this year!